Harder Than The First Time

This is the title to a song by Barlow Girl. Barlow Girl is my favorite band by far because so many of their songs speak to me personally. When I got to speak at youth group I used one of their songs that really fit with what I was speaking about and what I was going through. Now I have another one.

This song is about how sometimes you kind of take God for granted. Lately I have been letting other things get in the way of really setting aside the time to press in to God and read my bible, that sort of thing. I get so busy with work and school that I just fit in time to spend with Him when I can. I know that this is not the way to do things, and so it frustrates me even more because I still do it. I will be consistent about reading my bible everyday for a week or so, but then I fall back into the pattern of letting the concerns of life get in the way.

How can I expect God to use me to make an impact and see change in my school when I'm not committed to spending time with him the way I know I should be. For awhile I haven't felt like God has been using me much to impact the people around me. I'm sure my lack of consistency in my relationship with Him has something to do with it.

I have been following God for a while and so throughout this time I have learned a lot. I know that God is in control and he will take care of me, and so this is how I sometimes take him for granted. I have just gotten used to knowing that no matter what, God will always be there when I need him. However, I absolutley know that this is not the way I want to keep doing things.

I am NOT SATISFIED with things the way they are. I'm NOT OK with the fact that I have not really been making an impact on the people around me. I want to know more about God and the plan that He has for my life, and I know that letting other unimportant things distract me from Him will not get me to the place I want to be. This song kind of embodies how I feel and how I have acted lately.

Harder Than the First Time

I walked with you

Just like we've done for so long

You seemed so near

But even that's become so common

It's not just you, just been together so long

That I thought I knew everything about you

But today I saw; did you open up my eyes?

'Cause I feel like I've just seen you for the first time

Chorus

I didn't see you

But God I want to

You've come alive and I think I've fallen harder than the first time

Was I so blind; how did I not see you?

Yet in all that time you never left my side

So for all my life, I will live to know you

So here I am; I'll take your hand

Bridge

I see your face; I feel you close

The love you've always shown me

Won't miss it now, can't waste a day

Jesus I'm yours completely

I have come to the realization that when you are going through a problem that you're usually not the only one going through it. So this is my challenge to my fellow bloggers and readers who go to school with me, it is time to re-evaluate how committed you have actually been in your relationship with God. I know that there are some things that I need to do differently, and I am commiting to make the necessary changes because I'm not satisfied with things the way they are now.

We are all in this fight together to transform our school. When we all aren't serving God to our fullest capacity, then as a group we can't reach our full potential. School will be over in 4 months, and I'm not willing to let this school year to be wasted because I let other things get in the way of my commitment to God.